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Islam does not believe in unnatural life. It demands a life according to the law of nature. Hence, Islam does not approve of a piety which is based on the suppression of sensual urge of man. Proper channel for releasing sexual energy leaves a person physical and mentally satiated and satisfied. It gives a sense of relief and saves from depravity, degradation and sexual perversions. Observing asceticism and celibacy means unnatural, improper and unprincipled life.

This natural and healthy way of satisfaction of sexual impulse is through marriage which is the sacred union of two opposite sexes for love and procreation of legal offspring's. It paves the way for physical, mental and moral progress of human society.

Family life is the basic unit of social order. Hence it should be stable, orderly and well-organized. And only a righteous society can give birth to a sublime culture and civilization.

But for these objects of Human life a balanced and pleasant matrimonial life is a must which depends solely on the perfect awareness of rights and duties of the married life and for a smooth and successful marital life Islam lays down some codes of conduct and principles both for the husband and the wife.

Islam lays down certain responsibilities on the husbands regarding their wives. Some of them are given below.

A husband is required to love with his wife in proper manner so that family life goes on smoothly without any problem, conflict and bitterness.

The Holy Qur'an says:

"And live with them in a good manner."  (Nisa 19)

Hadrat  Anas (Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

" When a man marries, he gets his religion half perfected. Then he should keep fearing for  the next half." (Baihaqi)

While seeking the hand of a woman for marriage, one should keep in mind that she has sweet appearance, good manners, sound character and child-bearing capacities. Hence a male is permitted to have a sight of his female partner before marriage.

Hadrat Jabir (Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

" When anyone of you wants to seek the hand of a woman for marriage and he is able to have a look at her, let him do so." (Abu Dawud)

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) addressed a heavily-attended congregation on the occasion of Hujjat-ul-Widah (Last Hajj) and enjoined upon the Muslims:

" O people! Listen! Behave well towards women, for they are like captives with you. You have no right to treat them harshly unless they rise in disobedience against you. In case they show disobedience, keep your had away in the bed-room. But if they obey you they must not be harassed on various pretexts.

Listen carefully! you have some rights over your wives and your wives have rights over you. They guard your beds against being polluted by others and see that the persons disliked by you must not find entrance in your house. And listen they have their rights over that you should feed and clothe them well."

Your wives should have a place of honors in house. Moreover, you should entertain a good opinion about your wife. She deserves your justice, good treatment, patience, endurance, broadmindedness and large-heartedness. You should behave decently and show tolerance even if she proves lacking in domestic skills, household responsibilities, manners, features and appearance. In such a case her virtues should be appreciated and her drawbacks ignored.

In case you dislike your wife you should not decide on separation for your wife in hot haste: You may have dislike for certain things in her but it may be your subjective opinion which can be changed. If you wait and watch her conduct and behavior sympathetically, your may find in her some such excellent and fine qualities as may compensate her failings.

The Holy Qur'an says:

" .... And if you dislike them, it may be that you dislike a thing while Allah as placed therein abundant good." (Nisa 19)

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has elucidated this point further:

"A Muslim wife should not be hated by a Muslim husband. If he dislikes some habits of his wife, he may like some others." (Abu Dawud)

In fact, every woman, like every individual, has some weaknesses, drawbacks and shortcomings. If a husband grows annoyed with his wife on account of general weaknesses and starts disliking her to the extent of hate and separation, it is almost impossible for any husband to keep his household going smoothly, peacefully and happily. Every husband should, therefore, be considerate, tolerant and wise enough to keep his wife well under his control, happy, satisfied and cooperative.

Almighty Allah is Forgiving and loves for forgiveness. Every husband should develop his attitude in him and practice it in his marital life. He should keep in mind that he has to deal with the weaker sex with delicate sense and sentiments and needs kindness, affection, pity, mercy, good treatment and co-operative attitude in carrying out the household affairs and daily business of life.

The Holy Qur'an says:

" O you who believe! truly, among your wives and your children are (some that are) enemies to yourselves: so beware of them! But if you forgive and overlook, and cover up (their faults), verily Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful." (Tasghabun 14)

In some cases the demands of families, i.e, wife and children may conflict with a man's  moral and spiritual convictions and duties. In such cases he must guard against the abandonment of his convictions, duties and ideals to their requests of desires. But he must not treat them harshly. He must make reasonable provision for them, and if they persist in opposing his clear duties and convictions, he must forgive them and not expose them to shame or ridicule, while at them some time holding on to his clear duty. Such cases occurred when godly men undertook exile from their native city of Makkah to follow the Faith in Madinah. In some cases their families murmured, but all come right in the end.

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) has given right guidance in the nature and psychology of womankind in his wise and prophetic words:

" Treat the womankind gracefully. She has been created out of the (man's) rib and the upper most part of the rib is crooked. If you try to straighten it forcibly it will break, while, if you leave it as it is, it would remain. crooked. Therefore treat the woman politely." (Bukhari, Muslim)

Home is the testing ground for judging taste, temper, conduct and behavior of man. It is here that he is closely and intimately connected and associated with his wife and offspring's. He is free to manifest his temperament and department at home. A Believer is at his best at his home, as the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) happened to be with his wives and relatives.

Hadrat A'isha (Allah be pleased with him) reports:

"I used to play with dolls along with my female companions. On the arrival of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) thy would hide themselves. But he used to search and send them to me for playing the game."  (Bukhari, Muslim)

One has to look after all the needs of his wife and spend on her and other family members with great pleasure. Food and clothing and other necessities of life of the wife are obligations on the husband which he should carry out as a duty with an open and cheerful heart.

Spending on family carries great reward to the expender. The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) observed:

" If one spends a dinar in the way of Allah; he spends another dinar to get a slave freed; he give away one dinar as alms to a beggar, and he spends one dinar on his famly. Among all these, the dinar spent on the family will earn the best reward." (Muslim)

It is incumbent upon every husband to teach his wife and children laws and principles of Islam and train them in good conduct and right manners. Every effort should be made to make the woman well-versed in the art of serving her husband well and teaching good manners to her children. She has to play the role of a good wife, a good mother and pious devotee of Almighty Allah in all situations -- good or bad.

The Holy Qur'an directs:

" O you who believe! save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is Men and stones....." ( Tharim 6)

We must, therefore, carefully guard not only own conduct, but the conduct of our families, and of all who are near and dear to us.

Allah's Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) made all efforts to train his family members good and great in respect of piety. good manners and devotion to Almighty Allah. Addressing the wives of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him) Allah, the Exalted said:

" And recite what is rehearsed to you in you homes" (Al-Ahzab 34)

It means not only 'remember', but recite,' 'teach', 'make known', 'publish' the Message which you learn at home from the Holy Prophet (peace and blessing of Allah be upon him), the fountain of spiritual knowledge.

Hadrat Umar ibn Khattab (Allah be pleased with him) would say prayer at night and wake his wife in the morning to say prayers, and recited the verse:

"And direct your family members to offer prayers and be constant therein." ( Ta-Ha 132)

If needed, a Believer is permitted to have four wives at a time. But the binding condition is maintaining equality among them in all respects.

Hadrat Abu Hurairah (Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:

"If a man fails to treat his two wives on equal footing, he will find his half body paralysed on the Day of Resurrection."

For a wife the first prerequisite is the obedience of husband. Pleasure and satisfaction of husband should be the summum bonum of her life. She has to live for his husband and die for him. This is the command of Allah. And this pleasure and satisfaction should come to the busband with a willing heart of the wife without any pressure, coercion and compulsion, otherwise tension will keep building on resulting in collision and breakage.

The Holy Qur'an affirms:

" So righteous women are obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard."  (Nisa 34)

Explaining the duties of a wife towards her husband, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has mentioned:

"A Believer does not derive more benefit (through any other source) after that fear of Allah than from the righteous woman. As he commands her, she submits to his command, as he looks towards her, she pleases him, and if he asks her on oath to do anything, she tries to acquit herself of this responsibility, and when he is away from her, she watches his interests in regard to her own self and his property."  (Ibn Majah)

Guarding the husband's rights is really a favour from Allah, as it is Allah that guards them.

And this is the height of obedience when the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) warns:

"No wife should observe any fast without seeking permission from her husband." (Abu Dawud)

Every wife has to guard her honor, modesty and chastity at all costs. She has, therefore, to avoid all such situations or surroundings or environment which has the possibilities of posing threat to her modesty. This is not essential only for keeping the love and confidence of her husband grows suspicious of her modesty and purity, no amount of service, devotion and obedience can win his heart and the marital life is bound to dash against the rock of distrust. Hence every wife has to exercise utmost care and vigilance in this sphere of life.

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has said:

"If the wife offers prayers five times a day, protects her modesty, and remains faithful to her husband, she is free to enter Paradise by whichever gate she likes."

The wife has no right to leave the house of her husband without his prior permission. Moreover, she should not go to the houses her husband is not having good relation with.

Hadrat Mu'adh bin Jabal (Allah be pleased with him) reports that the Holy Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has said:

"It is not permitted for a woman who believes in Allah to admit a man into her house whose visit is not approved of by her husband or that she should go out of the house against the will of her husband or she should obey the will of someone else in opposition to her husband's wishes."

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has said:

" The woman who dies in a state that her husband was in agreement with her, will certainly go to Paradise." (Tirmidhi)

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) further observed:

" When a husband calls his wife to fulfill his sexual need and she declines and for this reason the husband passes the whole night in anger, the angles send curses upon such a wife till dawn." (Bukhari, Muslim)

Hadarat As'ma (Allah be pleased with her) reports:

"I was once with my neighbor friends that The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) Passed by after saying 'salam' (Peace be on you) to us he (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) remarked:

"Don't show ingratitude whom you owe a debt of gratitude. Anyone of you, for example, lives with her parents in an unmarried state for a long time. Thereafter she gets a husband by the Grace of Allah and she is granted issues by His Mercy. But in spite of all these favors when she grows angry with her husband she utters:

"Never have I received anything good from you."

Issuing warning to such an ungrateful and thankless wife, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) observed:

"On the Day of Resurrection, Allah will not turn towards a woman who is ungrateful to her husband, in spite of the fact that a wife cannot go with her husband." ( Nisa'i)

Every wife should feel pleasure in serving her husband and make it a motto of his life. She should make all efforts at her command to provide comfort to her husband. The holy wives of the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) would do all household tasks and served their husband too.

Hadrat A'isha (Allah be pleased with her) used to serve the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) with utmost love and care. She would wash his cloths and his head, combed it, anointed it with oil and rubbed perfume on his holy person. Other ladies of the Companions (Allah be pleased with them) served their husbands with the same care.

In order to indicate the most reverend, esteemed, honorable and glorious position a husband has in the life of a wife, the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) has observed:

" It is forbidden for a human being to lay in prostration before another human. Had it been permissible, every wife would have been ordained by Allah to prostrate before her husband. The husband enjoys such a supreme status that if his whole body is covered with wounds and the wife licks them all with her tongue, the right of her husband is even then not fulfilled in full measure."

Red text sign is Qur'anic Verses or Prayers and Blue Text is sign Roman English, Green text Traditions of the Holy Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him)